“You know what I want?”

I love how all my children talk in their sleep. When they dream I can always tell if it’s good or not. Most of the time they all seem to have good dreams and Bairno in particular has funny dreams, or at least dreams that make him rather happy. He often laughs in his sleep.

On a few occasions he has awakened me with his laughing in/at his dream only to awaken and turn quickly into tears because he wanted to go back to his dream. One morning he told me through tears, “Mama, I want to go back to sleep; my dream was funny and it wasn’t done yet.” Poor babe. I asked him what it was about and he said it was about giraffes telling elephants jokes. Oh, this boy loves giraffes. He wants a pet giraffe. I made him some pajamas that are too small now and I can not find any more fabric to make more. He makes up stories about giraffes. He makes up adventures and acts them out. He loves giraffes.

This morning he and RevMrKnowTea were sleeping a bit later than usual, so while my cup of coffee brewed in the kitchen I crawled back in the bed next to Bairno (4 yo) and gave him a kiss as he was laughing at yet another dream. Then without opening his eyes he squeezed my neck and he said, …
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Please pass the pause button

Moggiepillar

Life is happening in fast forward right now. I would like life to give me a pause button.

We are still struggling without a washing machine, but by choice since we are waiting for the tax return to come in and then we can place our order! That thrills me to the bones. I might get a washing machine for Valentine’s Day.

There are bits and pieces of life that are feeling rather surreal these days. My children are growing up. So much is happening right now I do not want to miss it. The busy-ness of life has me slightly anxious I am going to miss something. The people my children are growing into are really fun to be around (most of the time). I still have my moments of deep desire to be around people other than my offspring, but they are fun.
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Failure

Yesterday was one of those days when I felt like a complete failure. A day that started out good enough but turned bad quickly. Homeschooling is a huge struggle for me. I like order; they prefer chaos. Without order I need a special white coat that allows me to hug myself for comfort and padded rooms. When their love of chaos erupts it’s six (or seven) against one and I want to run away – far, far away. My survival mechanism turns on and all defenses go up and I turn into this massive unfeeling, robot who snaps at the slightest bit of noise, movement, or gesture that is not involved or pertaining to anything on the list of things that need to be done.

I show them what to do. I expect them to do it. Yes, they may fail, they may not understand, they may need help, they may need more. Failure when learned from leads to success. All of those things are poor excuses for NOT doing what is expected. I have told them numerous times what is expected of them and lately it is worse than ever before. They have a check list. I provide the necessary items they need.
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A near miss

I think my children are trying to kill themselves or see who can be the first to give me a heart attack.

They were in the den, on the couch. I heard the thud. I heard the cry. It settled to a quiet sob fairly quickly then a yell at a sibling. I was slow(er than usual) to get to him as he has been grumpy and fussy and a pain in the boo-tay all day. He was “letting a sibling have it” with some choice four year old words. Totally wish I had it recorded.

He walked to me crying, we met, and THERE IT WAS!

Bright as tomato juice dripping down his sweet sad face, mixed in with the tears, was the blood.

My heart sank.

My stomach rose.

The guilt consumed.
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Mama Blessings

Candy_tn

It has been a rough day. I would venture to say it even compares heavily to being a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day…

…even in Australia.

With the exception of one thing.

front(ish)
from the front/side

What is this, you ask?
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